Tuesday, June 21, 2005

Sometimes in this big ol' Altlantic home.

Some days, when this big, ol' house by the Atlantic get silent...

When not even the bamboo chimes in the front window clinking ‘cause no breeze ain’t blowing...

...And not even them big, black bumblebees buzzing cause they hiding from scatter, scatter rain and sticky humidity...

...When all I can hear is them floorboard going 'crik crik' under me bare feet...

...And I curl up to read on the settee, like this Sunday gone...

I does remember how pack up this house used to be...me two brothers, they friends, me one sister, we cousins, we friends...

...Then how I does miss everybody, now that all o' them gone Abroad. I does miss them like how you does long for water in the scorching heat.

Sometimes, when this big, ol' house by the Atlantic get quiet, just like this Sunday gone, I does want to hear that long, tall, brown Portuguese friend o' me brother, I does even want to hear he belting out Angie like that day so many years ago, when he sing it like a cat wailing on a wall for two hours straight 'til we ears ring with misery.

I does want to hear me gyal friends gyaffing, one ask who is the ugliest boy in town, and before we could even say hmm she shoot out the boy name like a bullet, and all o' we laugh and agree 'cause we was wicked teenage gyals. One night we gyals lie down in the verandah to sleep in the sea breeze, and we watch stars, and talk about the year 2004, nah, that too far, that can’t ever reach, we think, then we fall asleep, and mosquitoes zoom in and sting we hot hot hot, and chase we inside. And we parents laugh next morning.

Sometimes, I does want to hear we cracking crab shells around we faded pink kitchen table, crabs soaked in thick, spicy boulanger curry, that is, eggplant curry, and if you get a big, big boonga, a big, big tentacle, you got to show it off.

How I does want to see me brother friends too, I swear me brothers had one hundred friends. I does still remember the one who family had to run from China. He tell we that one day in China, beggars move into they house, and he father hear that that was the new law.

That brother friend from China did smiling, gentle, but haha, he din't know to reverse he car, he first car, and he used to drive all the way around this circle road to get out.

This big ol' house by the Atlantic was united nations with all colour people, all size. If you had a problem, you come here, live here, stay here, eat here, laugh here. If you din't have a problem, you stay here, laugh here, eat here, sleep here.

But now, everybody gone, auntie uncle sister brother cousin niece nephew mamu, cha cha, cha chee whatever you call them bretheren, that is, brother-friend, and sisteren, sister-friend, all o' them gone Abroad now. It look like if somebody cut a hole, cut a hole in the atmosphere, the stratosphere, and everybody leak out and gone. That is what corrupt politics do to we, cut we up, tear we up, divide up we family of friends.

And now, when this big, ol' house by the Altantic get quiet, and all I can hear is me own self turning on the settee, I does wonder how everybody doing, and I hope life treating them good.


Dan Flynn said...

Quick msg. I don't know why people can't comment directly on my blog, I just thought it was a system thing. I'll try and find out.


Dan Flynn said...

Back again. I think I've fixed the problem. Didn't realise I had a blocker on...


analis.M said...

Oh Guyana-Girl...I still here wid you too.

I don't think that I've read anything that made my heart twist and squeeze in my chest like this. I actually felt it like it hurt me for a second.

How tings like dis cyan happen, eh?

Now dis pervasive sadness feel like it want to swallow me up. Right now as I writing dis, the wind actually howling outside...like how writers duz describe it in dem books and the coconut tree right outside me room sound like thousands ah clicks and swishes. And when I look at the branches of the tree they waving slow and sad. It gon rain. Eh-eh …I better close all de windows dem just in case it rain soon.

Everybody leave Guyana just in case the place get worse. It get worse, den it get better then it get bad again.

Me ent know cuz...me jus' want lie down in me bed and roll up and cry cause I know how you feeling and I feel it too. I feel like is we alone hey!

Anoop said...

That was very touching, and somewhere I can relate to it. I must say, without a doubt, that was the best piece from you that I have read.

Dan Flynn said...

Ah, such a sweet post. It's a funny thing but that hole your family has stepped into, the world they've gone to has also come to you. I'm constantly amazed at how small the world has become, jeeze look at us, writing to each other as though we were neighbours. I love the world wide web, it shivers everytime a friend comes on line. It shimmers and whispers and sings so we all can hear it, Anoop down south, Sarah even further south, you near the equator, Mimi and me in the north (west and east). Amazing thing this www. If I ever make it to Guyana I'll come and sit with you in that big ol Atlantic house, on the porch and look eastward over the sea. I love the sea. Herman Melville called it the greatest metaphor of them all. I am lucky that my first nine years were by the sea, the waves and spray and tide, the curling crashing water. As your family goes out to the world, Gyal, we bring the world to you.


DCveR said...

GG, I make dan's words mine also, we bring in fact the a piece of the world to you, in a way, but we take also a bit of you to the rest of the world, to those we meet and who don't read your words here. So a bit of you is traveling inside many hearts all over this earth.

DCveR said...

OK, try and get this mp3 from the inbox of fadobox@walla.com, if everything goes well I'll send some more to that address.

Guyana-Gyal said...

Thank you analis.M, for being here. I didn't mean to make you sad. I hope you feel better soon. But I know why you're sad, not for me or you, but for our country that has so much potential.

Anoop, thank you :-)

You say somewhere you can relate to what I wrote...? Is it for India or for friends gone?

Dan and Dcver...you are so right...people all over the world are reaching out to each other... and I think it's wonderful, this sharing of thoughts, ideas and selves.

I never did think of it that way, the way you two expressed it, that you're bringing the world to me, and in the same way, I'm out there, in the world.

I hope in this way, we can all build bridges towards each other.

Dan, who knows, maybe one day the mosquitoes won't scare you from visiting Guyana.

[Herman Melville was so right about the metaphor of the sea.]

Dcver, as soon as I finish some work I'm doing, I'm going to check out that fado. Can't wait! Thanks for taking the time to share.

I hope everyone interested will check it out too, fado music from Portugal.

Ale said...

So everyone left. have you ever thought of leaving too?

I have many friends all over the world... we used to all run around and be crazy together (while at school) and now all left is work work and work- thank goodness for email and cellphones at least.

haha- about the friend driving in circles--
I will link you-ok-

Anoop said...

Its about people leaving their own country. Dont get me wrong, I am not against someone leaving a country. Like if someone went to Norway to work there and liked the place and settled there after working there for 4-5 years, thats understandable. But living with the only intention of settling abroad???? But then I guess different people have different priorities in life.

Anonymous said...

That is good. So, many nationalities are interacting here.
I am from Brazil,everyone knows that, Dcver is from Portugal, GG is based in Guyana. Who else is posting messages. Hey GG, I read about the Basilect, Mesolect and the Acrolect. So, I am looking forward to your help, I mean, to try to reach those people from the University of Guyana. By the way,do you know any student who is at the moment studying Languages at UG, especially Creole language. That would be a pleasure to have someone who is also studying the language at the moment. Anyway, thanks for everything.

Guyana-Gyal said...

Ale [is that pronounced Ah-lay?] I did leave for a while but came back for family reasons.

We had a change of govt. and now we do see some progress...so I wish people would COME BACK to help develop Guyana.

Been reading your blog...gee, you're one gal full of joie de vivre, full of life and joy.

P.S. I wish I knew how to add links to this template!

Anoop, I know exactly what you mean...people living just to Abroad. It's as if we're producing people to export 'em.

Guyana will take longer to grow because of people shortage.

Okay Paulo...today I'll make those phone calls to the university.

Hm...you're right...so many nationalities interracting here...there's Ale in the US, Anoop in India, sometimes Sarah who's from New Zealand, now in Australia, DCveR-Portugal, and a while back, Tony, American working in Iraq, Kanga Roo from Australia.

I wonder where the Guyanese are though?

Twine said...

Hey Gyal, what do you mean 'where are the Guyanese'. Aren't we here? Kung-fu Mama, Analis.m and me? I know we aren't physically there any more, but we all still remain Guyanese at heart. Like analis.m, ah choke up when ah read it. I miss the big house and everyone, but life doesn't remain the same. Even here in the UK, many people are leaving to other countries for better job opportunities and what they hope will be a better way of life.

Dan the Man has an amazingly wonderful way of expressing his thoughts and he's right...we all still deh here together, keeping old friendships and making new ones.

p.s. haha...dat ugly boy name 'scary gary'.

Guyana-Gyal said...

Twine, hee hee, I knew that would get you to comment: "where are the Guyanese."

Funny enough, I didn't mean where are they on this blog...I meant where are they in terms of this country?

Yes, yes, life changes and people move on...but I think many Guyanese have left this place behind more than just physically...many don't want to have ANYTHING to do with here.

Many are ashamed of acknowledging that they're Guyanese, or part Guyanese. Cultural cringe.

And Anoop is right about some folks going abroad for the sake of going abroad. Lotsa folks leave for better lives, to run from bandits, but quite a few leave because they want to live Abroad. If you could hear some of the stories, haha...

To be honest, this post was not about me personally.

It's a reflection of how Guyanese here feel sometimes.

Guyana-Gyal said...

Scary Gary?!? You one wicked gyal Twine, hahaha...I wonder where HE is now?

Anonymous said...

We here . All over the place.
Why did we leave??? Burnham , Money, children, education... or are those the excuses...
Remember my friend G from p/nagar.. she had it all... big house, big job, hubby with own biz.,cook, maid, gardner AND driver.Yet she left too. Now she lives in a duplex, works really hard , and does her own cooking,cleaning, gardening and driving .
What does it take to come home... ?
Does one wait until the kids are grown and the careers are done or should it be done while there is still time to teach the children bout life in a slower zone?
Seattle coz

Guyana-Gyal said...

Is true, a lot of people leave for very valid reasons, very valid. Burnham, bandits, want to live a safe life. And nobody blames them, nobody. In fact, people envy them.

But some people leave and they had such gooooood life here, and they go Abroad and STRUGGLE.

What will it take to come back?

Heh. Wait when we find OIL.

We drilling, we drilling for oil, wait when we find, heh!

Psst...no sign of the damn oil though. Musta leaked and left too.

kungfu mama said...

siiigh..hooome..me does long for home still cause is couple of yall gone, but me heart does till bruk everytime July come by....8 yrs soon eh?

but me does talk bout me childhood days to dem boys dis, and you should see dem eyes, if dem eye can get mo big dan it is ahready...I does tell dem bout the 30 cats, dogs, parrot, turtle, monkey..ah missing anything??? ohBardi the hummingbird...who had an easy life wid us for a bit...

comic book saturdays, de time neighbours data said moooo to the cow an it butt she and neighbour son would come bak from studying abroad an would halla 3am to me . L... I come hooooom...an me..ah right i gon see you in de morning...by 8 am he ova dere hanging..neighbour big data does seh she wold gee anything to smell dead dawg..hahahaha

Cousin L an me used to share wan plate of food cause me too lazy to mess up mo dan wan plate an glass..

gooseberry jam...that game we used to play with plenty elastic..oooh yesss..chinese skipping with all dem people who live down de road..

an mos of all asking 2nd brother in the morning aaayeee..you got the bread knife? mommy want it..you got the butter? is where the pressure pot deh? dat is when all brother fren dem come ova..an de doors dem full of holes from playing darts..

wan day daddy come home an all ah we too quiet..no music nuttin an he tell mommy to ker aaallll oh we to the doctor we too quite so something mus ah happen wid we...

me remember looots of things...

Seattle cuz an she brother Kahkee....hahahaaa..

ow gyal, me does miss home baaaad

Guyana-Gyal said...

Kungufu mama, I read somewhere that a person 'can't come home again'...meaning, it's never the same as you remember. You might be bored out of your skull now, if you came home to live.

But who knows? Some might love the easy pace. And warmth. Warmth in weather. Warmth of people.

kungfu mama said...

gyal, even if i did come home, dem boys wont be happy too long dere...de tings dem accustom to now...dem football, swimming, golf, basketball, gameboy wid dem friends, diggin for fossils in de back yard...an a bunch more...

i would enjoy it for a time too..but i enjoy doing those things wid dem two monkees...

JAMATECH said...

These are beautiful words, flowery and true. The truth in these words ring more sweetly in my ears than before, thanks to my present situation.

Guyana-Gyal said...

Missing loved ones is a helluva thing, Tony. But we do our best, and cope, eh?

Anonymous said...

dear GG,
thanks to your blog you are doing your part to link your fellow Guyanese with the rest of the www.
with your stories our planet gets smaller every day.
keep on bloggin'
kind regards,
Kanga Roo