Wednesday, June 22, 2005


"Them stones grow!"

Me mother voice sound bemused, full o' wonder.

This was Monday morning. Me mother just come back from examining she garden, and we sit down quiet, quiet now, reading the newspapers. So I thinking is some strange piece o' news she imparting to the air, got to be the air, 'cause is the air she staring at, not at me. She eyes open wide, and she mouth in a 'oh'.

I scrunch up me face and ask, "Eh?"

She say, "Y'know how people does say stone does grow...?"

"People or Guyanese?"

"Ahhhh man, Guyanese, people...whatever...y'know how people does say stone does grow?"

"Ptttzz," I tell she.

"Them two stones under the cashew tree grow. Them did li'l, li'l so." She hold out she hands to show a stone size seven inches.

Now...I got to tell you, me mother know she history, world history, geography, things that plenty people don’t know, that buried in encyclopaedias. She know science, she know books, she got a cupboard full o' literature, six shelves, and each shelf got books three layers deep.

I start one piece o' laughing and pointing me finger and shaking it at she and saying at the top o' me voice, "I. Can’t. Believe. That. You. Of all people. Can. Say. Something. Like. That!!! Oh my gosh!!!"

Y'know, she face ain't show even one ounce o' shame. Not even one lilogramme o' shame.

She say, "Go and look, you gon see for y'self, them two stones grow. Me coulda lift them before and now them so big me can't even budge them."

And you won’t believe this.

I like A Fool went and look.

Under the cashew tree I look.

Two humongous stones sitting there, round and dark grey with li'l bit o' moss, king size stone and big-queen size stone, one foot by one foot wide.

Me first thought was, oh crap, them stones grow for true. Then, what happen to the two smaller stones? Then, you damn fool, you don’t even remember if two smaller stones been there before. Then, them two big stones been there all the time.

"Them two big stones been there all the time," I laugh and tell me mother.

"No," she insist. [She is a stubborn lady]. "Them stones grow."

Tuesday I say to Kamla the cleaning lady, "You ever hear stone does grow?"

"Yyyyes," she say. "Stone does grow."

"You ever see a stone grow, Kamla? You ever stand and watch and see a stone grow?"

"No, but me hear people say stone does grow. And them does grow for true."

Gabbagabba...yie yie yie yie...mnnngg mmnngg...gaahhh...If any o' you come to Guyana and see a Gyal staring at stones and gibbering, is me.


Anonymous said...

Chile , you know how some people does siddung wid a good book and a cuppa tea? Well I does like fuh siddung in front of this blasted machine wid me cawfee/tea or caffeetea... and read you blogs. Me does laugh like hyena on drugs. dem pickney does watch me in wonder.
Me does even cry too, like that story wid dem chirren; oh gawd how I bawl.
Anyhow what I really want to say is that you say it like no one else. You bring back the life and spirit of Gtown to me so far away. I am amazed at how sharp the images you evoke appear in my mind.
Your writing is soooo good . you bad for days.
Am waiting for the next step.
Kepp on blogging.
Seattle coz

P.S. If Pa was still here I bet he would have a story about stones that grow. Ask the mumma.

Guyana-Gyal said...

Seattle coz, you fill me heart with gladness. Sigh. It overflowing with happiness, how I glad to hear from you and get all these compliments.

But tell me, you ever hear such a weird thing? Stones does grow.

In Guyana if people only HEAR something, it becomes a fact!

Anonymous said...

Maybe Aunty bin watering dem when she water she plants. an fertilize tem too.
Seattle coz.

Anonymous said...

GG. Wow, I AGREE with these people. You write so well. Although I am not Guyanese, I feel as one and as I said in previous posts, I HAVE fallen in love with Guyana culture. Hey, Did you get time to call the University of Guyana? Well, I hope you had a great time today.

Paulo from RondonĂ³polis-Brazil

analis.M said...

Yes GG is a talent, a fierce writer with a sharp eye and a great sense of humor.

If you ask me, you want to believe that the stone grow, GG! You believe it, but because yuh stay a Doubting Thomas you got to seh is pyure madness.

Ow! It nevah occur to you that is me Aunty perspective change???

And weh dat wiley sista of mine deh? She betta stap drink cawfee and write me tail!

analis.M said...

Yes GG is a talent, a fierce writer with a sharp eye and a great sense of humor.

If you ask me, you want to believe that the stone grow, GG! You believe it, but because yuh stay a Doubting Thomas you got to seh is pyure madness.

Ow! It nevah occur to you that is me Aunty perspective change???

And weh dat wiley sista of mine deh? She betta stap drink cawfee and write me tail!

Anoop said...

I Agree... she is one hell of a writer... and her sense of humour is very good too.... unless you have put a stone in my head and its growing too ;)

P.S. :- Mount Everest grows and shrinks too ;)

Dan Flynn said...

Great Manchester band from the 80's and 90's called The Stone Roses. Either roses that grow as stone or stone that grows as roses. And all that time the band was really from Guyana! I believe your mum, bookish people are never wrong.

Twine said...

WELL, I believe what Aunty say is true. You know all dis fuss people make bout Stonehenge? What really happen is dat one day in de middle of summer, a lil boy been playing in the field and he arrange some stones in circle pattern (yuh know how lil children like playing with stones). Anyway his mummy call him for dinner, so he run home and lef dem dere and forget bout them. An after a long, long time, dem stones grow bigger and bigger. An now all dem scientists, philosophers and druidy-people got all kind of theories bout how dey get dere.....but is only de ones dat the lil boy lef dat grow big.

DCveR said...

They grow all righty!!!

Guyana-Gyal said...

Paulo, I'm so sorry, I didn't get a chance to phone yesterday, been out all day. Later today I will post some addresses and see if I can get an email address for you too.

Now...all you STONED people out are all just lovers of rumours. You hear something, so you believe it's true. Me? I'm a Doubting Thomas, always been, don't believe everything I hear.

Twine, that was one hilarious story! And see? Some of them stones went to Manchester too, and Mount Everest, and the rest my mother watered and fertilized.

I told her she's older that's why she can't lift them, perspective change.

She's still INSISTING that them stones grow....hahahahaha...that's lunatic laughter, yes, loooonatic laughter...gggooo goooo gggaaagaa...

Sincerely, Doubting Thomas giggling and fumbing amongst the rumours.

Twine said...

Yuh know I suddenly remember dem stones. Is the same two small, small stones that been under the cashew tree that yuh talking bout? I cyan believe dey grow so big. My goodness, how time goes by.

Ale said...

naaaahhh- can't beeee! :)

kungfu mama said...

remember gyal, if you mudda seh it green, it green, so de stones grow, dem de front cashew tree or back wan? de back wan de birds dem always doing poopie, so those stones mussi pile front wan, me ent know..wen we go we gon look at it...

as for tings big nephew say dat he hear how dinosaurs does grow, so he tek wan ah he dinos an put it in wata overnite. couple days pass an nuttin aint happen...two days pass an de lil nephew say it need to get dem put it in de every time i open fridge door me seeing frozen dinos...still waiting to grow..

Seattle cuz, is wha ya do? me hear ya come dung hey soon, me gon visit you dis year..i promise...

cuzzin tail sholdnt tak bout dont write nobordee ida....

Twine, if is de front cashew tree by the fence, when we used to tro seed mussi all dem seed dat grow to from big rock...

Dan Flynn said...

Just accept what your mama says Gyal, Jeeze even us Europeans have heard of the Great Guyanese Growing Stones of Georgetown.

Guyana-Gyal said...

Ale, Thank you, girl. I was beginning to think the stones did grow!

The next thing I know, Twine is going to ask me if the stones asked for Aunty Twine.

Dan Dan Dan...I'm trying to teach my mother that I'm always right...wot you tellin' me now?

Oh good grief. Now my dear, smart nephew, kung fu mama informs me, is trying to grow plastic dinosaurs in water, in the fridge...

kungfu mama said...

your dear nephews have come to the confusion that the dinosaurs dont grow but they like the way the dinos look in the there they remain...

Guyana-Gyal said...

They need to plant them in the garden, Kungfu mama.

kungfu mama said...

dont give them ideas..i gee dem some hyacinth bulbs to plant an dem coming up..but, eh-eh, dem bais got green tums...

oh, de big one been diggin for fossils in de back yard an he find someting...we save it..i tink is wan lizard dead long time an he lef he prints in de rock..wid teeth to...aye yai sons...

Camille said... still love how you write a break from runaway brides and war all over de planet and love how you h-express yuhself.