Sunday, June 05, 2005

Early to bed, early to rise. Etc.

Is who did say “Early to bed, early to rise makes a gyal healthy, wealthy and wise”?

Man look, soak that in hot water and boil it with plenty grain o’ salt, you lucky if it feed you. Every blinking night I find me tail early o’ clock in bed, and every blooming morning, as the sky start to blush rose pink, I jooking me hand under me pillow, poking me head under me bed, searching for this Wealth.

One day I find a 50 cent coin under me bed.

You know they does say, “Another day, another dollar”?


That was another day, another 50 cent. I should invest it, lemme find a financial advisor.

As for the other two. Healthy and Wise.

Healthy? If somebody say that Kitchy Coo is a disease going ‘round now, I get it instantly. I ain’t know the symptoms but I swear I ketch it right away. I think it was li’l sister who did say me is a hypocondreeack…? That’s the word? She always think she know everything. But I don't run to doctors in a hurry so I don’t know what she talking about.

And Wise?

Well, they say Guyana got a bad brain drain. That mean all the smart people gone abroad. So if all the brains from here leak and gone abroad, and me still here...

...What that tell you?

Anyway, I get really tired of this Early To Bed story, so I went with Cousin L. and she husband to visit two friends, H & T.

Cousin L. and she husband pick me up in they Jeep instead of they car. They had to use the Jeep because, even though H. & T. living in a fancy place, the roads a leetle bad. Potholes deep like swimming pool and some o' them round like fish ponds all the way.

[Alright, alright, what is a li’l exaggeration between friends? But truly, the road indeed got plenty big cavities].

Yesterday was the day the Jeep decide it gon behave bad. It shut down every quarter mile. Cousin L. Husband had to cut holes in the floor, and we had to do like Fred Flintstone and company, stick we feet through the holes and run we feet fast fast fast to get the Jeep to start.

[Alright, alright, so is not completely true. But that is what we did contemplating doing].

Anyway, we reach H. & T. home. We only went to visit, to say hi and so on, and the next thing we know, we end up staying for dinner. One other married couple come by with they teeny, eeny baby daughter, they li’l son and the married couple husband’s mother-in-law.

Oh me Lawd. Let me tell you!

Never go to dinner with a bunch o’ Guyanese. You can’t even hear you self chomping you food in you own mouth.

Person at west end o’ the table having conversation with person wayyyy down the east end. Me at south talking to somebody across at north; same thing happening left and right. Words speed out and have traffic jam over the food, and everybody interrupting everybody.

We enjoy weself so much we stay late, even them li’l children stay awake.

Now? I so sleepy I can’t even remember me name.

Hear this thing, no. I goin’ to bed.

Tomorrow I got to wake up early o’ clock to check under me pillow and bed...


Anoop said...

hhahahaa that was funny... My day has started on a good note.

scribe called steff said...

i'm up so late that waking up late's gonna be like waking up early. silly steff, late nights are for kids.

"early o'clock." simple, but great. nice.

tomorrow i'm buffing my first query, guyana. getting off my ass. i'm gonna email it tuesday.

my financial situation tells me it's imperative. i love a little motivation.

we're off to see the wizard.

Camille said...

Maybe I should sleep ALL the time to ensure me financial and physical security....that is a wonderful thought...time to change de things we teach we children bout going to bed.

Me like dis one TOO Guyana-gal.

kungfu mama said...

your nephew is a hypo..he over eat de odda day..yup..he engine got lil hot..he eat salmon, potatoes, summin else an den fruits an drink ting i know, he tro up lil bit..he come to me..i need medicine, i tro up...if anybody else got to take medicine, he want some too...
anyhow, enjoy all dem naise an halla down table, is one of the nicest ting dat dey table lil but it got plenty naise tho...

Guyana-Gyal said...

I woke too early. Did that proverb say anything about waking too early? Does it affect our ability to get wealth?

Anoop, I am still laughing at your sloooow barber. Gee, time has a way of running away, doesn't it?

Hey, Steff, you go girl. Go Steff, go Steff...

Camille, my mother had a laundry said, 'I slept and dream that life was beauty, I woke and found that life was duty.'

My brother then added, "So I went back to sleep again."

Awww, my po' yittle nephew, tell him there are some things he should NOT get from his auntie, Kung Fu Mama.

kungfu mama said...

de boy done tek afta you..he like food baaaaaaaaaad..if he done eat an he see me sitting an eating..he say..can i haff sum? he cute..hehehe

Guyana-Gyal said...

Of courshe he'sh cute, he takes after meeeee....

Anonymous said...

yall can sit down an eat mingo together....
ya sis

Guyana-Gyal said...

Slurp, we got more mangoes from Neighbour again!!

But Miami got a thing name Mamay. ooooooh. Niiiiice.

Anonymous said...

wha is mingo?
is the same language as pomato?
An by the way if the table ain't loud it mean people vex wid each other nuh?
who want dat.
Sigh! how I miss the loud times.
Seattle coz

Guyana-Gyal said...

Mingo is mango with 'merican accent.

Pomato - tomato with bad Guyanese spelling.

Oh Lawd, if a tableful o' people is silent that is a finneral...funeral.

Anonymous said...

i believe the early to bed... quote has been attributed to benjamin franklin

Guyana-Gyal said...

Benjamin Franklin? Thank you Anon.