Thursday, February 17, 2005

A cupful of mosquitoes

Phoned a pensioner to see how she was faring after the flood. She talks in a straight, flat line when she’s happy. A straight, flat line when she’s sad. A straight, flat line when she’s excited. A straight, flat line when she’s stressed.

In a straight, flat line she’d once told my mother, “Some people near me, them cuss me up. Them tell me how me son them is auntie-man. Them no auntie-man. Is just that them can’t find the right gal to marry.”

[For those not in the know, an auntie-man is a gay guy.]

In a straight, flat line she told me, “We done clean up the place. We buy all we medicine, bleach and so, and wash down the place. Now, if you see masquita all over the place. After five o’ clock, we does lock up tight, tight. Lock the door, lock all them window. We no go outside. One night, we spray the veranda. If you see masquita. When we sweep them up, one cupful we sweep up.”

“How much?!?” I asked, just to make sure I'd heard right.

She laughed in a straight, flat line. “One cupful o’ masquita.”

She'd endured the flood, in a calm, flat line.


Anonymous said...

dear guyana gyal, downunder here in oz we know about mosquita. here we call them mozzies. like you we are still challenged by and challenge the English language. sweep up a cupfull of mosquita? here in oz we need a shovel. not to shovel them up into a cup, but to beat them back as we try to flee inside to escape their vampire bites.

Guyana-Gyal said...

Dear Kanga Roo, the aussie mozzies are nothing like ours.

Ours are big dark things on wings. They cast shadows on the walls. When you hit them, you feel them crunch. They have bones.

P.S. I've seen Ozzie the Mozzie, the iron sculpture. He looked friendly.

Missing Home said...

I have to agree with Guyana-Gyal on the shadows on the walls, they also crrruuuunch when u smaaack them...and den leave dem in a plie to see where the ants are coming from so you can kill them too...Oh beautiful Guyana